11/30/2006
Train Tracks
Josh Garrels - Restless Ones
U2 - Beautiful Day
Lynard Skynard - Sweet Home Alabama
The Eels - Rotten World Blues
Johnny Cash - Folsom Prison Blues
Martin Sexton - Freedom of the Road
Jack Johnson - Breakdown
Bonnie Summerville - Winding Road
Simon and Garfunkle - Homeward Bound
Little Feat - Oh, Atlanta
The Red Hot Chili Peppers - Road Trippin'
The Allman Brothers Band - Midnight Rider
Muddy Waters - All Night Long
Credence Clearwater Revival - Proud Mary
The Beatles - Daytripper
Coldplay - Clocks
Theivery Corporation - Lebanese Blonde
Cake - Long Line of Cars
11/29/2006
some wisdom
"I am reminded of this precious instruction [when you encounter another person...you must think, what is the Lord asking of me in this moment, in this situation?] by my own great failure to live up to it recently. Calvin says somewhere that each of us is an actor on a stage and God is the audience. That metaphor has always interested me, because it makes us artists of our behavior, and the reaction of God to us might be thought of as aesthetic rather than morally judgmental in the ordinary sense. How well do we understand our role? With how much assurance do we perform it? I suppose Calvin's God was a Frenchman, just as mine is a Middle Westerner of New England extraction. Well, we all bring such light to bear on these great matters as we can. I do like Calvin's image, though, because it suggests how God might actually enjoy us. I believe we think about that far too little. It would be a way into understanding essential things, since presumably the world exists for God's enjoyment, not in any simple sense, of course, but as you enjoy the being of a child even when he is in every way a thorn in your heart." (page 124)
"A good sermon is one side of a passionate conversation. It has to be heard in that way. There are three parties to it, of course, but so are there even to the most private thought - the self that yields the thought, the self that acknowledges and in some way responds to the thought, and the Lord. That is a remarkable thing to consider." (page 44)
"I believe I have tried never to say anything Edward would have found callow or naive. That constraint has been useful to me, in my opinion. It may be a form of defensiveness, but I hope it has at least been useful on balance. There is a tendency among some religious people even to invite ridicule and to bring down on themselves an intellectual contempt which seems to me in some cases justified. Nevertheless, I would advise you against defensiveness on principle. It precludes best eventualities along with the worst. At the most basic level, it expresses a lack of faith. As I have said, the worst eventualities can have great value as experience. And often enough when we think we are protecting ourselves, we are struggling against our rescuer. I know this, I have seen the truth of it with my own eyes, though I have not myself always managed to live by it, the Good Lord knows. I truly doubt I would know how to live by it for even a day, or an hour. That is a remarkable thing to consider." (page 154)
11/20/2006
winter blues
T
Later this week I will gather in
11/09/2006
fall break

I'm halfway through the first half of the year. This fall I've felt like I'm in a Star Trek episode, specifically one of those strange ones where they mess with the space-time continuum. Somehow it feels like I've been back in Budapest for about two weeks, but that it's also been about two years since I left my family and Seattle. So, what to do? Go to England, that's what. It was a great week complete with lots of laughs, a few pints at the pub, plenty of the English language (spoken, written, even sung!), many reunions with good friends, and one very difficult goodbye. A few years ago I was very blessed to spend a summer living with the most English man you could ever imagine and his wonderful wife. Tony is no longer with us, but I'm thankful I had the opportunity to know him and look forward to seeing him again someday.
10/04/2006
free write
In a recent spree of film watching I've taken in Cool Hand Luke, a new documentary called Freedom's Fury, and tonight Mr. Smith Goes to Washington (among others). Between those thoughtful films, the recent political happenings in
Then, two weeks later, the bottom of his world fell back out. The university kicked him out because he had no money to pay tuition. He was under the mistaken impression they were giving him a full scholarship. Now we're back to square one, trying to improve his writing and vocabulary enough so he can think about applying to a school in the states. It just doesn't seem fair. He doesn't have the freedom to pursue his dream because he doesn't have the money.
9/19/2006
liar, liar, pants on fire
8/23/2006
year two
8/08/2006
called out
One book that changed your life: A lot of books qualify (the Bible, anyone?), so I'll go for something early on and say The Grapes of Wrath. During my junior year of high school my English class read The Great Gatsby, which I had done the year before at my old high school. Ms. Sylanski let me read a novel independently and write a paper on it and I chose "The Grapes." The experience contributed to my choice of college major (English), college (Calvin), and current vocation (English teacher - thanks for remembering, Bethany).
One book you have read more than once: I guess they probably want the one you've read the most, or something like that? The Killer Angels, by Michael Shaara. It was my "home from school sick" book (and then movie, after Gettysburg came out).
One book you would want on a desert island: Raft Building for Dummies? No, probably something like The Brothers Karamazov. I've now read it twice (once in class with Ericsson!) and still don't feel like I've scratched the surface of it. Besides, it takes forever to read!
One book that made you laugh: Most recently it was The Undertaking, by Thomas Lynch. I love dark humor.
One book you wish you had written: Anything by F. Beuchner qualifies, but top choice would be Telling the Truth. It's pretty brilliant and the man can turn a phrase!
One book you wish had never been written: I'm not sure I have the right to say this since I've never read it, but my choice is Left Behind (and all the other drivel it spawned) for theological and aesthetic reasons.
One book that made you cry: Though it started slow, Gilead, by Marilynne Robinson, brought on a few tears at the end. (Your choice did too, Bethany.)
One book you are currently reading: I finished Going Nucular, by Geoffrey Nunberg, this morning, so now it's To Kill a Mockingbird (since I have to teach it in a few weeks).
One book you have been meaning to read: According to my half.com wish list, the two books I've been wanting for the longest are Lolita, by Nabakov (can't believe I still haven't read it yet), and The Atoms of Language, by Mark. C. Baker.
One book you wish everyone would read, and why: I'm stuck on this one. I guess, probably, the Bible. It's the book that has most influenced western culture, and it's a pretty good story too.
Honorable Mentions (you guess for which category): The Chosen (Chiam Potok), Master and Margarita (Mikhail Bulgakov), The Voyage of the Dawn Treader (C.S. Lewis), Walden (H. D. Thoreau), Exclusion and Embrace (Miroslav Volf), The Lord of the Rings (Tolkein), Budapest: A Critical Guide (Andras Torok), The Crucible (Arthur Miller), The Brothers K (David James Duncan), Where the Wild Things Are (Maurice Sendak)
I'm not tagging people, but I would love to hear from any and all of you with your answers.
7/30/2006
teaching america
7/07/2006
a bit of silliness
7/04/2006
more sports
Mark Galli has written the article I've been waiting a long time to read. In the latest issue of Books and Culture his piece, "On a Pass and a Prayer: Why we no longer believe in sports but should," lucidly explains why we need sportswriting, or what he calls "stories about the games themselves, and their heroes, when men and women act out great dramas, games of tragedy and hope, meaningful precisely because they transcend the usual social calculus."
Galli works on a few important themes, starting with the idea that the often miraculous nature of sports is good for us as people who suffer from "a widespread loss of transcendence." I don't use that word miraculous lightly. It's easy to explain away just about everything, but what else do we call it when something entirely unbelievable happens? Sports is one realm where things that have absolutely no business happening take place with some regularity!
If, as Galli suggests, in sports we are reflecting our creator by creating our own worlds - worlds with joy, grace, pain, miracles, and tragedy, just like our own world - sports do matter. I love trying to view social issues through the lens of sports (which Galli argues is the direction most sportswriting is going), but we can also appreciate sports and the stories of sports on their own merit. It's popular in some circles to talk about God's relationship to this world in terms of a story. I love the idea (of course I do - I'm an English major), and look for connections between our stories (in literature, film, life, and, of course, sport) and The Story. It's those connections that give the drama of sports so much value.
6/29/2006
"the fringes of english usage"
6/22/2006
sport preoccupation
6/20/2006
confounded and confused
Then, in one of those "is this really happening" moments, I heard the first few chords of the opening song, and I didn't know whether to laugh, cry, shout for joy, or collapse out of sheer emotional exhaustion. It was a song written by my friend Ron that has a great deal of meaning for me. As I sang it lustily I was filled with gratitude (because I was once again worshipping with a community I knew and understood), sadness (because I miss the people I shared that sang with at Calvin), joy (because this song, of all they could have chosen, was the one that welcomed me back to the States), and many other emotions.
The song was a microcosm for the rest of the service. We did many things that seem as familiar to me as breathing, said words I've repeated countless times (Heidelberg Catechism Q&A 1!), and sang songs that are a part of me to my very core (Praise to the Lord the Almighty, God be merciful to me, I could sing of your love forever, even the doxology!). Yet, I hadn't had the chance to do any of those things in corporate worship in almost a year. Yes, my church in Budapest is wonderful and I'm not complaining about it. However, Sanctuary is part of the same tradition I am. It feels like home to me in a way that I don't think my little Scottish Presbyterian church ever will.
At church yesterday I was incredibly grateful for this sense of community and place, but the more I think about it the more I'm confused by it. Is this a good thing? Am I somehow reinforcing the division in the body of Christ by acknowledging these feelings? I want to go back and read M. Craig Barnes' Searching for Home again, because I think he gets at this idea. It's especially strange because I've been so frustrated at this very same tradition lately. Mary and the smart people who comment on her blog (she's smart too, incidentally) have had an interesting discussion of the issue, so I won't add to it. I will say, though, that despite many people from my denomination's inherently flawed approach to scripture I love this tradition of which I'm a part. Even though some of my brothers and sisters may find me more worthy of being a denominational leader simply because I have only one X chromosome, they are still my brothers and sisters. For better or worse they are my community, the group that defines home for me. Now the question is... which one is it? For better or worse?
6/19/2006
monday morning... midfielder?
It was all over for me - I was hooked. But while I was overseas for my formative world cup experience, this year was my first chance to enjoy the world cup while living in a real soccer crazy country. You can walk down the Vaci Utca in Budapest and literally not miss a minute of play because every cafe and restaurant has the match playing. Little coffee shops who look like they're barely scraping by suddenly have 64 inch plasma screens hanging up outside! Last week the Czechs embarassed the US, while I watched on a giant screen in the main square of Budapest with hundreds of other people. My students could talk about nothing else the next day.
I've just spent the morning watching Andrei Shevchenko remind the world he's one of the best in the world and can carry the Ukraine to the second round by himself if he has to. With all the color, pageantry, and excitment of the players and fans, it's the most exciting sporting event in the world (with apologies to March Madness). I can't wait for the knock out rounds!
reflections at 34,000 feet (or 10,363 meters)
I love flying. I know the seats are small, the food is bad, the company can be strange, and it’s terrible for the environment, but having twelve hours during which it’s literally impossible for me to be always doing something or always going somewhere isn’t such a bad thing. Lufthansa, whose fine service I’m enjoying, now has wireless internet on its flights (for a small fee), but I’m resisting the urge. In a few hours I’ll really want to know how the soccer is going, but even that can wait until I get to LA. I’m cut off from the world by 6 miles of air, and it’s finally given me the chance to reflect on a few things.
My music choice at the moment is “Hit the Road, Jack” by Ray Charles. There’s no better song for making an exit, and that’s what I’m doing. Yesterday I finished my first year at Kossuth Lajos Muszaki Kettannyelvu Szakkozepiskola (and that’s the first time I’ve gotten the entire name of the school down from memory!). I’ll be back next year, of course, but for now I’m heading back to the world of baseball games, good Mexican food, Mom’s home cooking, and English! I don’t know what I’m going to do when confronted with the reality that I can understand everybody around me and they can understand me right back.
I don’t know how I’ll respond to what some call reverse culture shock, and from what people tell me I won’t even be consistent in my response. The same grocery store that I love one day because I have so many choices might be debilitatingly overwhelming the next. So, for those of you who will see me soon, please have patience! But enough of that for now – I’m going home and I couldn’t be more excited.
The last few weeks have been overwhelming in their own right. You may have noticed that the frequency of posts on this site has dwindled. I remember teachers telling me they looked forward to the end of the school year as much as we students did. I never believed them, and I was right. Now I know teachers look forward to the end of the year even more than their students do! As a student I just had to worry about my own exams and final projects. Now I have to create fair evaluations that allow my students to demonstrate their abilities. Then I have to be as objective as I can in administering those tests and grading those assignments. And finally, because of the way the education system here works, I have to prove to my administration that my appraisals are fair and valid. Then multiply that process by 110 (the number of students I teach).
I hope this doesn’t sound too much like whining. Even though I’m thrilled all that stuff is finished I know my students deserve nothing less. They (or rather most of them) have worked hard all year and need to be able to demonstrate that. Of course, that’s why it kills me when a good student walks into an oral exam and gets flustered by the first curve ball we throw and falls apart. Suddenly he or she can’t even remember how to conjugate “to be” when yesterday she/he was tossing around conditional progressives like a pro. Amid all the end of the year evaluations I also got to pass out my summer reading assignments. Yes, next year I’ll get to teach American and British literature in addition to English language classes. One of the summer tasks I’m most looking forward to is creating the syllabi – any suggestions?
As I look back on the year I’m thankful for how well things have gone in the classroom. My students were almost always hard working and diligent, and I think they learned a lot. I haven’t read their course evaluations yet, but I think they liked me a bit too! We had a great turnout for our end of the year cook out, and I was reminded how much I enjoy just hanging out with these kids (even when they're positively schooling me at soccer). I couldn't ask for any better students for a first year of teaching. I think I'll probably be posting a bit more on the transition as I adjust. Only six hours until I land in LA - I wonder what I'll think!
5/25/2006
some randomness
"The Reformation was a time when men went blind, staggering drunk because they had discovered, in the dusty basement of late medievalism, a whole cellarful of fifteen-hundred-year-old, two hundred proof grace - of bottle after bottle of pure distillate of Scripture, one sip of which would convince anyone that God saves us single-handedly. The word of the Gospel - after all those centuries of trying to lift yourself into heaven by worrying about the perfection of your bootstraps - suddenly turned out to be a flat announcement that the saved were home before they started... Grace has to be drunk straight: no water, no ice, and certainly no ginger ale; neither goodness, nor badness, nor the flowers that bloom in the spring of super spirituality could be allowed to enter into the case."
I liked the imagery.
Also, I recently codified my thoughts on chick flicks and a friend suggested I put them on my blog. There are eight requirements any romantic comedy must fulfill for me to judge it a good chick flick.
1) There must be something unique about the setting, concept, or idea of the film. Somebody can say "the film with the X" or "the one about an X" and know which movie you mean. For example, "the movie about the American movie star and the English bookshop guy" is obvious, but "the one about Cinderella" is not.
2) There has to be SOMETHING unpredictable in the movie. If I can tell you every major plot development after seeing the first five minutes of the film we're in trouble.
3) Dialogue, dialogue, dialogue! Chick flicks live and die by the realism and wittiness of their dialogue. If it's cheesy and trite they're awful, but snappy banter can save even a lukewarm plot.
4) It has to have realistic characters - none of those flat, one-sided, all-we-know-about-them-is-the-love-story characters, please. I want real people with real quirks and real emotional responses to real problems. I know realism isn't a hallmark of these films, and I'm not asking for every situation to be realistic (see number 1). However, given a few stretches for us to believe, the rest should be easy to accept. For example, when we believe that a rich businessman is willing to spend loads of money to hire one hooker for a whole week, it's not that difficult to imagine her slowly using the money to transform herself into a more refined woman.
5) It must have a good soundtrack. This is the most underrated part of a chick flick, but it's vital. These are movies about emotion and if the music doesn't set the right emotional tone you're sunk.
6) It has to have at least one pantheon-level repeatable line. There should be one that brings the film to mind whenever you hear it, regardless of context. In fact this is a good rule for almost all genres of movies.
7) They have to throw the guys a bone. It doesn't need to be something big, but few small "guy" moments in the film are must! Examples are the whole "Brooks Robinson is the greatest third baseman ever" subplot in Sleepless in Seattle, or the "Dirty Dozen" scene at the dinner table in that film (which I think is the single greatest guy moment in a chick flick).
and 8)... actually, I forget number 8. I'm sure it was something good. It's not a closed list - I take suggestions. Now you can decide for yourself if a chick flick passes the test. I've used a few of my favorites as examples (though I don't know if Pretty Woman is really a favorite of mine), but the archetypal chick flick is, and always will be, Casablanca.
5/09/2006
crossing the abyss
5/05/2006
a trip to the embassy
It was fairly busy, so I got to watch a few Hungarian people go through the security line in front of me. The guard was brusque and efficient with them, but when he heard my accent-less English he broke into a wide smile and started chatting amicably with me. He asked me where I was from, why I was in Budapest, and the other standard questions (as he took away my beloved laptop, probably to put some sort of spy tracking device in it...). It felt really good to be treated nicely.
In the waiting room they have a machine that gives you a number depending on which button you push. There were about two dozen people waiting, so I pressed the "US Citizen" button and settled into a comfy chair with my book (Open Heart by Frederick Buechner). Much to my surprise, I got to read all of about a paragraph before my number was called. When I got to the window I asked if there hadn't been some mistake. I was assured that all those people were Hungarians there to apply for visas, and I didn't have to wait for them. Again, it felt good to be kind of special, but also awkward.
I guess you can argue that, as an American, it's my embassy and I should be treated that way. However, that's the attitude of entitlement that really angers me about so many Americans. I wanted to say something - but how do you complain about something like that? So I leave it for you to decide for yourself. Maybe this is a symptom of a larger ideological problem. Or maybe I'm just overly sensitive.
