This weekend I was privileged to be a groomsman in my friend Ryan Voogt’s marriage to Shannon De Young. The whirlwind 45-hour trip to Grand Rapids was a great time on all fronts, but the ceremony itself was beautiful. I wanted to share with you the vows they made to one another yesterday in front of God and all those gathered to witness the service. May God give them strength to keep their promises.
The Way of Creation (Genesis 2:18-25): Here at last is bone of my bones, flesh of my flesh, divine help in a form I understand. You are the image of God for me. God speaks to me in your voice. God looks at me through your eyes. God touches me with your hands. And, in my love for you, I too may reflect God.
The Way of Denial (Ephesians 5:21-33): I take you, Ryan/Shannon, to be my husband/wife, to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer or poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish until death parts us. Nothing else will have the power, for today I turn away from all other options. Forsaking all others, I commit myself to you. I will seek to serve you with tenderness and respect, energy and intelligence, imagination and love.
The Way of Renewal (Matthew 12:46-50): I take you, Ryan/Shannon, to be my brother/sister in Christ, for this life and for the next. Let our love be loved within the community of his church, and our home be embraced by a household of faith. However much our love for one another deepens, I promise to love God even more than I love you. I ask you to love God even more than you love me, that our growing love for him will draw us closer to one another.
The Way of the Spirit (Romans 12): I take you, Ryan/Shannon, to be my partner in Christ’s service. I will help you develop God’s gifts in you and work with you for the coming kingdom of God. I will listen with you for God’s call on our lives, that our home may be a place where the good news is proclaimed, where justice and mercy are lived, where God’s children are welcomed, and where God’s name is honored. May our marriage give him joy!
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"Humility, that low, sweet root, From which all heavenly virtues shoot" - Thomas More
3 comments:
Hey Matt,
good to catch up on your blog. thanks for sharing the thoughtful vows. They explain themselves well...I too took them with my beloved one year ago. (Thank you Laura Smit!)
Reading them again pushed this question to the forefront...
What is your take on helping married friends to daily live those vows? (that is, how can a community of faith truly support this couple, and vice versa...)
I'm so glad you brought that up, Susan! I hope Ryan doesn't mind me telling that the chat he had with the groomsmen in the "dudes' room" before the wedding was one of the most challenging and moving of my life. He told us of the traditional role of the groomsman, and pushed us to be faithful in our duties as his. It's a daunting task for me, but one I'm honored to have.
As for the specifics, I'm not sure just yet. I know one way the community of Christ can better serve married couples is by pushing them to be more open and honest about what has become purely a "private" issue. Since when is the health of a marriage irrelevent to other areas of life? That's one thing that jumps to my mind, but I would love to hear what others might suggest.
oh suitie matt. sam schoofs left a comment on my blog with a link to your site. he was telling me about vogit's vows, and i almost started to cry reading them just now. anyhow, thanks for sharing. i'll be back.
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